Chris Martin Sans Coldplay? When Hell Freezes Over

It’s hard to say if Chris Martin’s penchant for self-deprecating comments in interviews reveals an honest humility or faux sincerity. Either way, the man provides plenty of fodder for Coldplay fans and Schadenfreudists alike, so away we go.

In an interview with Dan DeLuca for The Philadelphia Inquirer, Martin elaborated more on how plagiarism accusations inspire him to write better songs and even swore on his “grandfather’s life” he didn’t steal from the Satch. Then there was this funny reaction to DeLuca’s question about a possible solo album:

“Hell would have to not only freeze over, but be skated over and completely closed up,” Martin said. “The pope would have to declare that it didn’t even exist. I can’t think of anything worse. And I’m sure most of your readers would agree.”

When DeLuca asks if he can call out Martin in the future if he ever changes his mind, Martin responds, “It would probably mean that I’ve been dumped by my wife and I desperately need the money.”

Nice. Perez and Us Weekly can probably squeeze a couple Gwyneth Paltrow headlines out of that one.